Part 1: Building Self-Confidence
Do you want to improve your self-confidence? On this first part of a series of blog posts, you will learn valuable information on how you can successfully build your self-confidence and live life feeling strong, confident and self-assured.
On this post, I am going to talk about the signs of low self-confidence. In identifying those signs, you will be able to recognize them and begin to conquer self-doubt. While there is no single factor that leads to a lack of confidence, most often, it is the accumulation of negative experiences from our past, which we fail to deal with when they happen. It is also the result of our failure to recognize who we truly are and what hinders our own growth.
Low self-confidence is defeating. It can define us and cause us to beat ourselves up emotionally. It can limit our abilities and keep us from growing and moving forward from our mistakes, failures, and defeats. It confines us to our comfort zone where everything we believe is safe from potential humiliation and further mistakes.
We then are stuck in that comfort zone, we became complacent. We avoid stepping a bit outward and moving away in the hope of averting being left hurt and disappointed. However, once you are stuck in that zone, it becomes very hard to move forward in life thereby keeping us from achieving our dreams, reaching our goals and living a rich full life.
Therefore, no matter we tell ourselves how harsh and messed up things could get, we should not surrender to the inner critic that thrives inside us. Constantly giving in to this false self-image will leave us in an emotional state filled with self-doubt and a profound lack of confidence.
The Origin of Self-Doubt
Low self-confidence usually develops during childhood. As unfortunate as it may seem, many of us have family, teachers, friends, and enemies who are confidently happy to point out our mistakes or faults. Rather than praising our talents, we received criticisms.
People around us may not have realized, even with the goodness of their hearts, that it might have created a big impact on our self-confidence. Situations may not even be verbal, but often their actions speak louder than words. Because of this, it made us feel inadequate and worthless early during our developmental years.
Perhaps you lived under cold critical eyes of someone who do not see the good in anything. Or maybe you are related to an overachiever and lived in the shadow of their accomplishments. Other times, it might have made you feel like you cannot do anything right.
These are all the triggers that can make you feel inferior and inadequate which only added to your lack of confidence.
With poor role models and lack of support around us, many individuals end up feeling as if they are incapable of doing certain things They grew up feeling incompetent in achieving anything of value. But the truth of the matter is, each of us has our own inner strength and power to take control of our lives. We just have to have the confidence to do it.
The First Step in Building Self-Confidence
Once you recognize the underlying causes of your lack of confidence, you can begin the process of overcoming the impact it has on your life. The best place to start is by evaluating the triggers that smash your confidence and make you feel inadequate. A good place to start is by keeping a journal.
They say that a journey to a thousand miles begins with a single step. So the first step is to have a journal dedicated to your self-discovery.
Personally, a journal has helped me chronicle and got to know more about myself as I went through this journey of self-discovery since 1982. I suggest that you get a journal or notebook for this assignment (any notebook will do). Also, you can download a free journal page by clicking here to print out and start journaling.
In your journal, write down:
- The time when you are feeling less than confident
- What caused you to feel that way
- Things that you could do differently that will help make you feel better and more confident about yourself.
By identifying these triggers and combating them with positive reinforcement, you can begin to move forward and become the self-confident person inside you.
This subject will be a series of 12 posts. To read the next succeeding blogs on this subject to increase your self-confidence then sign up below.
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